"Was he a smoker?"

KJayMonster · New User Joined: 05 May 2005 Posts: 1

I'm 26. Last year I lost my grandmother to Lung Cancer . My good friend was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Luekemia In February. Two weeks ago my close friend and cousin (24 yrs old) was told she will be on dialysis for the rest of her life. Last week my grandfather was diagnosed with Lung Cancer and also cancer in his lymph nodes. Yesterday my father found out he has Lung Cancer.

Right now i'm in a zombie state but I have a question for those who have expierenced a lung cancer personally or a family member who has. Right now. When someone asks what kind of cancer my father has I tell them Lung Cancer and immediately they say ohh 'Was he a smoker"? Too me it feels like they are justifying his illness. I know that yes he was a smoker and that yes he should have stopped way before now. I feel very upset when a extended family member tells me 'Well, how long did he smoke for? He knew better than that.'"

Does it make it easier for them to deal with knowning that he probably caused it or brought him onto himself? I want to tell them they are are being callous and insensitive. I get really defensive.

Advice?

bethanyaok · Posted: Sat May 07, 2005 11:03 pm Post subject: Re: "Was he a smoker?"

Hi Kjay,

Sorry to hear about all the cancer in your family. My dad was diagnosed with lung cancer two years ago. Everytime I tell someone he has stage iv cancer, the next line is "What kind of Cancer?" I reply, "lung cancer, and of course the next question is "Was he a smoker?" UGH!! I also find that question offensive, and NO he was not a smoker, not a puff in his life, and what an insensitive and irrelevant question!

Yes, I think that some people want to believe they have more control over their health and moprtality than perhaps they really have!! They think, well, I don't smoke (or I quit smoking) so it will never happen to me. Asking the question also implies subtle blame on the person who has cancer. When someone is fighting cancer, what rationale could there possibly be for "blaming" the cancer patient???!!!

So, you can see this really does rub me the wrong way too. As for a comeback, you might say, "Yes, AND he is one of the most amazing, wonderful, courageous people I know."

Maybe that will silence them. Maybe not, some people who ask thoughtless questions just may not ever get it!!

Hope your grandfather and dad do well with their treatment. Some people do. My dad was diagnosed with bone metastasis, but up until recently there has been no progression of his disease. Now it is in his brain, and soon we'll know if whole brain radiation therapy has helped. Take care, and know that feeling like a zombie (shock) is one of the normal reactions to hearing such difficult news!

Bethany
PS I am a 5 year cancer survivor myself!! Currently no evidence of disease Very Happy

_________________
Bethany
breast cancer dx 4/17/00
4 AC, 28 rads, tamoxifen
7 years NED, and counting!
BRCA2+ 2/1/07

Lost Dad to Lung Cancer June '05

SGrrrl · New User Joined: 16 May 2005 Posts: 4 Location: USA

From someone who has also asked if a person smoked, I was under the impression that there were basically 2 types of lung cancer, one of them being the type that tends to hit smokers more than the other and unfortuntaly often being harder to treat then the other one.

Having had a friend who wasnt a smoker and who survived it, this was what I had been told by her many years ago, so I am not so sure people are necessarily putting the blame onto the patient but might have the same ideas about it that I do.

mdtaffet · New User Joined: 07 Jun 2005 Posts: 1

Hello,

I am a brand new member here.

My father is currently in the ICU recovering from surgery to remove the cancerous upper lobe of his right lung. My father has been a heavy smoker for many years, up until the day he finally got the diagnosis of lung cancer and his doctor told him to go home and throw them out. My father's cancer is squamous cell, which is highly associated with smoking. Fortunately it is only stage 1b or 2a (they gave us two stages which I guess means they weren't entirely sure), but he has had enough complications that he is still in the ICU now, a week after the surgery.

His biggest complication right now is the DTs (Delirium Tremens, aka the shakes), due to alcohol withdrawal. That started the day after the surgery. The next biggest complication is preexisting, in the form of damage caused by emphysema. There is also some pneumonia, a urinary tract infection, an infection at the surgical site, and one or two other things that I can't remember right now. He has been heavily sedated since Friday morning when he tried to remove all the tubes and get out of bed; he is in wrist restraints right now until the DTs resolve and he can remain calm while awake. Hopefully for the sake of all concerned, that day will come very soon.

In late April/early May of last year, his brother was diagnosed with a terminal case of stage 4 small cell lung cancer. His brother used to be a heavy smoker too, but quit over 20 years ago. So there's a comparison for you -- someone who hasn't smoked in 20 years got a nasty case of stage 4 small cell lung cancer (the fast growing type), while my dad who smoked every day until his diagnosis got stage 1b or 2a non-small cell cancer (the slow-growing type). Fortunately my uncle is in that 2% to 5% who is still living with stage 4 small cell lung cancer more than a year later, with his wonderful sense of humor completely intact.

That uncle's son had renal cancer many years ago. Then my cousin was diagnosed with either lung cancer, or renal cancer that had travelled to the lungs, back in late 2003. He was told at that time his condition was terminal. He opted for chemo, and was doing as well as could be expected until recently. His cancer moved to his brain in the last few months, and he just learned Friday that it has now spread to his spine. At this point, he is bedridden and not expected to last much longer. But he's still been around for at least a year beyond what they told him he could expect initially.

While we were in the ICU waiting room Sunday, my mother spoke to her brother, who was just released from a different ICU due to a bad reaction to a stent that had been installed due to the presence of an abdominal aortic aneurysm. Her other brother is undergoing treatment for prostate cancer.

So believe me when I say that I understand your "zombie state" all too well.

SGrrrl · New User Joined: 16 May 2005 Posts: 4 Location: USA

[quote][i] So there's a comparison for you -- someone who hasn't smoked in 20 years got a nasty case of stage 4 small cell lung cancer (the fast growing type)[/i] [/quote]

I too had a friend who hadnt smoked in 25 years and at Xmas time, at the age of 59 was diagnosed with exactly the same as u mention above and unfortunately passed away 5 days ago.

I'm 46 now and struggling with quitting myself.
It amazes me at how easy it is to convince yourself that you either have a few more years left of smoking before having to begin worrying about becoming ill........or other such forms of denial.

Peter Jennings, the newscaster is another examle of one that recently came down with it yet he hadnt smoked in over 20 years up until 911, so i suppose he was smoking again for roughly 4 years before being diagnosed.

leo · Contributor Joined: 23 Sep 2004 Posts: 1575

Hello

Interesting discussion. Most lung cancers are caused by tobacco, but none of us is safe. I always encourage anyone that smokes to try to quit, and offer all the assistance I can get. Afterall, reducing risks is important, but I know how difficult it is to quit smoking, and how addictive cigarettes are.

But once you have lung cancer, I think it is natural for people to ask whether he/she was a smoker or not. Not because they are insensitive, but I think people like to know what caused it. For the patient, I think he/she feels terrible about "causing the cancer themselves", which is not true, people have to realize that this is an addictive substance, possibly one of the most addictives known.

best regards,
Leo
_________________
Leonardo F - Webmaster Cancer Forums
Disclaimer: this information is for informational purposes only. It is not medical advice.

mikes · Senior User Joined: 25 Jul 2005 Posts: 143

As long as the cancer establishnment is preoccupied with smoking as the cause of lung cancer, they will never find a cure.

This is where we all find ourselves at this time.

The prognosis for Stage IV NSCLC is no better today than it was 30 years ago.

The key to finding a cure for this horrible disease is to actually finding the real cause.

Most web sites state that 87% of lung cancer is caused by smoking. Careful and exhaustive research on my part reveals that the definition used by CDC, NIH, NCI, and others would rate 72% of the entire population as smokers. The actual reported prevalence was 21% last year.

The incidence of smoking has gone down over 150% in the last 40 years while the incidence of lung cancer has more than doubled.

This is why we see many cases such as the Wife of Christopher Reeves where no smoking or ETS was involved. Everyone seems surprised to see this, but it has not changed since my work took me to every major cancer clinic in the the US and a number in Europe in the 70's.

I don't represent tobacco interests in any way, but as long as this straw-man approach continues, we will not find a cure.

debbieNY · Regular Joined: 04 Aug 2005 Posts: 16

Excellent info!!!!
DebbieNY

bev135 · New User Joined: 16 Aug 2005 Posts: 7

I have a real problem with people asking if the person who has lung cancer was a smoker. For the record, I have never smoked, and don't like being around it. However, I do recognize that it is an addiction, and demonizing the smoker is not a productive way to help them quit. Also, I'm a colon cancer survivor myself, and have been amazed that some people have hinted to me that perhaps I didn't make enough "bathroom trips", and perhaps that's why I got it (NO, I was ALWAYS in the bathroom a lot, perhaps that's part of the predisposition of the disease).
I look at it this way. If you met someone with AIDS, would you ask them how they got it - sexual contact, blood transfusion, IV drug use, etc.? Of course not! Yet, why is it okay to ask how one got cancer? It should not be acceptable. ANY illness should be met with compassion and support. Why should we cancer patients be somehow expected to prove we were not to blame for our illness before we receive the same compassion and support other people get? Why should any particular kind of cancer have to wait to be more "publicly acceptable" for it to receive the funding its numbers warrant?

mikes · Senior User Joined: 25 Jul 2005 Posts: 143

Hi Bev,

You make some very good points.

Lung cancer is at the top of the ladder in terms of cancer mortality, and near the bottom in research funding. Many people feel that this is because of the feeling that lung cancer is self inflicted by the patient.

On the other side of the coin, what has the billions already spent on cancer in general over the last 35 years really produced? For most solid tumors, there have been hardly any progress (2% at best). So what good would more research funding do?

Ironically, they would probably spend any more money if they had it on the anti-smoking campaign. The anti-smoking campaign never cured one case of cancer, but has provided a very good smoke screen (no pun intended) and distraction from the widespread failure of the war on cancer.

Thirty five years and over a trillion dollars... and no results! They need a straw man to take the blame for this failure. Enter smoking.

Does anyone question why Japan has a smoking rate over three times ours, and has but a small fraction of our lung cancer rate?

If you check into it as I have, you will find that people, both inside and out of the cancer establishment will acknowledge that the war on cancer has been a failure.

It doesn't just take money. It takes a real commitment on the part of the research community. If you carefully check to see where the funding to the universities and cancer centers comes from, I think it will be more clear why the real cause(s) of cancer has never been found.

Eileen Walukas · New User Joined: 15 Aug 2005 Posts: 1

My sister has just ben dignosed with right lobe lung cancer. Her PET scans showed no other place but her right lung lower lobe. On thurdsay she will have a lobectomy done. There is no lymph or other organ involvement. It seems she had pneumonia several thime and she couldn't shake it. Yes she was a former heavy smoker. Her doctor read her chart. "2 pack a day smoker for 20 years, positive PET scan' What do you expect. " she said whats my name?" He didn't know. Had to look at her chart. This is the one who is doing the surgery? She stopped smoking 9 years ago. Another MD told her if the medicine for pneumonia worked or not, don't come back to him. It is really nice here in Albany Ny. Right near albany medical center. They won't be doing the surgery. What do you think about that? I let you sometime thursday or Friday,her stage, but we think it is 1 no something or other. : :

Lana8 · Posted: Wed Aug 17, 2005 11:14 am Post subject: Re: "Was he a smoker?"

Pray your sister goes through the surgery well. My sister didn't get that option because hers was inoperable. Remember to post back and tell us how she is doing. That's what scares me, my sister died of lung cancer, I stopped smoking about 3 months ago and wonder if I should still be smoking. I should not be I am sure, but I am scared it could set off lung cancer because I quite. We are not sure what starts it to begine with. Keep us up to date. God Bless

MrsT · New User Joined: 12 Sep 2005 Posts: 3

When you say the cancer is inoperable, why is that? My dad has just had a lung ct scan amongst other tests. When the results were given to he and my mother, they were given a write up of what was found. As they were both frazzled, they are unable to answer any of our questions. The biopsy is scheduled for next week. Does anyone know what quote: mild mediastinal and left hilar adenopathy means, or lobulated pleaural based mass, or spiculated density? I just cant seem to put the terminology together on any medical dictionary websites. There was a diagnosis of emphysema and hiatal hernia along with this. I hope someone can help, Dad is now on painkillers as his left lung is full of fluid. Should the family be there when they do the biopsy, or when they drain the fluid? And you know what: Yes he was a smoker too.

joey · New User Joined: 08 Jul 2005 Posts: 6

ok, it seems to me like most people who Quit smoking end up being the ones who get lung cancer. Now that ive been smoking for a year and a half im scared i will get lung cancer when im older or soon. What are my chances of getting lung cancer being a "half pack - a day smoker" for a year & a half.

sherri · Posted: Fri Mar 17, 2006 7:53 am Post subject: Re: "Was he a smoker?"

Im a bit worried about this myself Joey, Ive been struggeling to quit for some time now, but, part of me wonders if the damage has already been done. Im 41 and have been smoking for about 25 years.
What really opens my eyes is just how strong of an addiction this really is. 4 months ago, my good friend died from COPD, she was a respirotory nurse, so she saw first hand....even while on oxygen, I saw her from time to time, take off her oxygen and smoke.

With me, my poor wonderful dad is dying with lung cancer, suffering, yet the minute I leave his house, I light up. Pretty sick, huh? I wish there were detox clinics for smokers. Lock me up for a month and then set me free, lol!

But, in all seriousness, this question haunts me too..."what if the damage is already done?"

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