About my husband...

shel · New User Joined: 20 Oct 2009 Posts: 7 Location: Texas

Hi. I've been reading this forum for a couple of weeks now. This is a very special group of people and I hope I am welcome here. I am very worried about my husband. I know that no one on here can diagnose him, he desperately needs a colonoscopy. But i'm hoping maybe someone could tell me if i'm over reacting or lead me in the right direction.

I'll give some history on Ron and just see what others think. He is 39 years old. He has been generally pretty healthy. He's been working in Iraq for the past six years so he is only home about four times a year. He is a heavy smoker. He smokes about three packs a day (!!!!!) He does not eat well, he practically lives on junk food. He is 5'11" and was 210 lbs. His sister died of ovarian cancer at the age of 44. She struggled for five years with this before it took her. His brother died of liver or colon cancer, we are not sure where it started. He passed away a few years ago at the age of 54. His father passed away at age 56 of lung cancer. There are many others on his side of the family however they are cousins and whatnot.

First off Ron beleives he has hemorroids. Although he's never been checked. In 17 years of marriage i've never known him to have a normal bowel movement. His is and has always been very narrow. I've seen it a few times (no not on purpose lol) he says it's always been narrow like a ribbon.

Recently when he was home he had diarrhea for over 12 days. Then it settled down a little. Now he is back in Iraq and he says it's started again. He refuses to go to the doctor even though i made him an appointment. Years ago he mentioned a little blood on the toilet paper but nothing recently.

He has also recently lost aprox 25 lbs in four months. I asked him how and he said he didn't know.

I apologize for the long post but i'm worried sick. We have two teenage daughters and he is very far away. Does any of this sound like cancer? it is so prevalent in his family. I know colon cancer has a high success rate if caught early enough. What should i do?

wytyspy · Experienced user Joined: 13 Nov 2006 Posts: 57

Hi Shel, It could be a number of things of which none are cancer. He really needs to see a doctor. That is the only way to find out exactly what the problem is with him. Praying that you get an answer soon.
Lucinda

shel · New User Joined: 20 Oct 2009 Posts: 7 Location: Texas

Thank you for your reply Lucinda. So none of those symptoms sound like cancer? that is a relief but i know it's still something. Diarrhea for over two weeks now can't be good. I just got an email from him telling me he now has nausea at times and some sort of anal discharge. He says it looks like food is not being digested all the way. When he was home he had some sort of clear discharge happen twice while he was sleeping. It's all very very strange. I asked him to see a doc in Iraq but he says they only have medics there who aren't fit to treat road kill. lol doesn't sound good. He's not due to come home for another two to four months.

DulcimerGal · Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2009 7:59 pm Post subject: Re: About my husband...

Hi Shel,

welcome to our forum - we are glad to have you!

These are different symptoms than what we typically see discussed - but - I did a quick google for 'clear anal discharge' and that's enough to tell me that your husband needs to see a Doctor asap. All the scenarios seem to need some sort of decent diagnosis and care. At the best - your husband may just have an infection or some parasite that can be simply treated with antibiotics. At worst - I suppose he could have something cancerous or even some blockage that some things are getting around - but not all.

Speculation is futile. You must encourage him to get help immediately. I am not familiar enough with the military to know what would be best. I do imagine though - that if the symptoms are serious enough surely they would medivac him out for a proper exam. Someone on here may know and can help from that point of view.

Good luck with your stubborn man! Keep posting and let us know how it goes -
Cheers
DulcimerGal
_________________
Rectal Cancer diagnosed Valentines Day 2008
Finished 6 weeks of radiation and chemo 4/23/08
Surgery to remove tumor - June 18th 2008
Colostomy Reversal August 20th 2008
Five rounds of Xeloda (chemo) to ZAP anything left!

shel · New User Joined: 20 Oct 2009 Posts: 7 Location: Texas

Thank you sweetie, i'll definitely keep on him about seeking out some sort of help. You are all in my prayers even though we've never met.

star · Senior User Joined: 02 Sep 2006 Posts: 232 Location: Ohio

Hi SHEL,

The only way you will have peace of mind and your husband to is if he will take his health serious and see a DR, maybe you could say to him see a Dr for you and your teenagers, if he wants to see them grow up he owes it to them to get tests done.

You really cannott mess on with your health, because if there is any thing serious, if you catch it early there is a chance, but if you keep putting off and its cancer could end up with stage 1V and then its harder to treat.

So keep pressing him and also keep praying ... all The Best..

Rob

wytyspy · Experienced user Joined: 13 Nov 2006 Posts: 57

Hi Shel, I am sorry. I did not intend my post to make you think it was not cancer. I was just saying it could be any number of things including cancer. I was trying to ease your thoughts.

Lucinda

shel · New User Joined: 20 Oct 2009 Posts: 7 Location: Texas

Thank you Rob and Lucinda. While I am still trying to get him to take it seriously i'm not having much luck. He is going to be off line for a few days so i won't know how he's doing. I'm hoping all is well again when i hear from him next week. He is under the impression that if there is no blood, there is no cancer. Is this true always?

Also with the fact that he lost 25 lbs in four months without trying scares me. Heck, i've been trying like crazy and my weight never budges!

Thank you so much for taking time to talk to me. I know something is wrong.
The questions i have are:

Since he's always had very narrow stools for at least ten years is it possible to have a tumor that long and not know it?

Is there always blood present if it's colon cancer?

Can heavy smoking for 20 years cause colon cancer?

I know we're gonna get into an argument over it all but i'm just really concerned for him. its very difficult to get a 38 year old man to believe he's not immortal.

REB · Posted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 2:30 pm Post subject: Re: About my husband...

[quote="star"]Hi SHEL,

The only way you will have peace of mind and your husband to is if he will take his health serious and see a DR, maybe you could say to him see a Dr for you and your teenagers, if he wants to see them grow up he owes it to them to get tests done.

You really cannott mess on with your health, because if there is any thing serious, if you catch it early there is a chance, but if you keep putting off and its cancer could end up with stage 1V and then its harder to treat.

So keep pressing him and also keep praying ... all The Best..

Rob[/quote]

I have to agree with Star. I wish I had gone to the doctor when my symptoms first started about a year before I finally went. It would have saved me a lot of grief. Get him to the doctor.
_________________
10/01/07 - Removal of Stage III Colon Cancer Tumor & Temporary Colostomy
11-07-07 - FOLFOX regimen - 5-FU (5 Flurouracil), leucovorin & oxaliplatin. Also Avastin
04-09-08 Finished Chemo, 04-28-08 Colostomy Reversal
06-02-09 1 Tumor on outside of colon & 2 in the adipose tissue - same cancer- SUV 5
06-23-09 FOLFIRI and ERBITUX chemo.
08-18-09 Tumors have shrunk. SUV 1
10-26-09 Tumors gone.
11-25-09 Finish FOLFIRI - Jan 2011 Finish ERBITUX?
Age Diagnosed 40. Current Age:42

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