Husband with esophageal cancer

Brenda · Regular Joined: 02 Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: GA

My husband was dx with esophageal cancer April '05. He was already to the point of not being able to swallow. He was immediately put on chemo and radiation and a feeding tube was inserted. The tube became abcessed the following day and had to come out. A couple of weeks later he developed a blood clot from his PICC line and had to go on blood thinners. So many complications kept postponing surgery. Now we find that it has spread to 9 lymph nodes and also to his bones. He has a tumor in his hip, one in the rib area and one on his lower back. The oncologist has never told us what stage it is, but we know it's in the final stages b/c he is having more radiation treatments, but no more chemo. The doc says after his treatments end, he will call in hospice to take over. My husband is only 51 years old. Does anyone know how to tell about how long he has left? The doc hasn't said and I don't want to ask in front of my husband. I know you all aren't experts, but I'm sure some of you have a lot of knowledge with these things.
Thanks for reading.

anewdawn · Regular Joined: 29 Jan 2006 Posts: 30

I am so sorry to hear that your husband has esophageal cancer. Based on the information you have provided, I would say he is probably stage IV. Generally when the cancer has spread or mets to other areas, they diagnose it as stage IV. From my own experience, Hospice is brought in when a doctor has determined that a patient has 6 months or less to live. But that is a generalization as I have seen some hospice patients live beyond the 6 months. I would ask the doctor to tell you exactly what stage your husbands cancer is. You need to have this information. Also, you might want to seek a second opinion at a major medical center that specializes in your husbands cancer. My local doctors gave me little chance to live. So I left town and traveled five hours to Fox Chase Cancer Center in Philadelphia. Needless to say, they saved my life. I had radiation, chemo and then surgery. I was stage III esophageal cancer which had spread to my stomach. This May will be two years in remission. Please do not give up. Make sure that your husband has the best doctors. Ask your doctor how many patients he has treated for this specific type of cancer. I hope this helps you. If you have any other questions, please post your message and I will answer as soon as possible. I just wanted you to know there is hope. Do not give up yet.

Dawn

Brenda · Regular Joined: 02 Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: GA

Dawn, first let me say thanks for your reply. I'm sorry you have had to go through this awful thing. The Ongologist we have is the head of the cancer center here and is supposed to be one of the very best. He started out with very aggressive treatments but due to all of the set backs along the way, things worsened. He had 34 radiation treatments (one each day) and 35 chemo treatments. (one every day) They gave us a pretty good outlook in the beginning. I think if he had been able to have the surgery early on, he could have licked this. Do you think that a second opinion at this late time would benefit us? He has had 3 PET scans, MRI's, CT scans and biopsies, all showing cancer. We are getting ready to go for a radiation treatment now and I have to dress him, so I have to stop now. I really do appreciate your kindness and information.
Brenda

mousa

Dear Brenda,

How are things now? I feel for you and your husband going through so much. Are your children near you? Do you have friends close by? Lean on them, ask them for help. Be close to your husband. Cuddle up and never mind that tears come. Remember the good times. Ask your Guardian Angel (we all have one or more!) for help. I think you already know that you have a strength you never suspected you had.

May God bless you and your husband and family.

Love, Mousa.

Brenda · Regular Joined: 02 Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: GA

Mousa,
Thanks for your reply. Things are not going very well right now. The oncologist discharged him on Wednesday and called Hospice to take over his care. Hospice started working with us Thursday and I must say, they are awesome people. According to the nurse and what she knows, she says she predicts he will be with us for only about a month longer. Yes our children are here in town. We each have a daughter from previous marriages, but none together. We do raise my granddaughter and have had her since birth. She is 10 now and is the light of his life. We are taking one day at a time right now, but they are not quality days due to the pain he is in. We pray that Hospice is going to be able to relieve some of the pain and give him some quality time.
Thanks for your concern.
Brenda

mousa

Dear Brenda, my prayers are with you all and am so glad that Hospice folks are with you. You might like to ask the hospice people if they know anyone who does Reiki. My husband found it very comforting and always slept well after a session. You, yourself, should try and take "time out". My 'time out' was at the end of the day after my husband was settled, hopefully for the night. Then I would make my favourite snack of camomille tea and toast and marmalade and read a book or do a crossword. But, more often than not, I went over all the folks who were giving support by actually being there or by writing and phoning, and I would thank each and every one.
Has hospice dealt with the pain? If not, ask them to.
love from me.

Brenda · Regular Joined: 02 Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: GA

Mousa, thanks for your continued concern. The Hospice people are working very hard to relieve his pain, but so far to no avail. I have to say again that they are awesome people. The doctor came out today and checked him and talked to him for a long time. When he was leaving, I walked outside and asked him what we were looking at, as far as time. He said he predicted 1-2 months. He seems to think that he will die of starvation rather than the cancer, b/c he can't eat. Anyone who has been through anything like this has to know that starvation is a terrible death. He has lost 80+ pounds. It is so hard to watch. We are just taking one day at a time right now.

anewdawn · Regular Joined: 29 Jan 2006 Posts: 30

Dear Brenda,

I am sorry to hear that things are not going well. I am glad to hear that hospice is now involved. They should be able to assist you and your husband through this very difficult time. I am sorry to hear that your husband is not eating. Is there anyway that they can insert another feeding tube? I would think that would be very important in keeping up his strength. Has anyone recommended Ensure or Boost? Has anyone recommended a pain pump? I am so sorry, I wish there was more that I could recommend to do. Please know that we are here for you when you need to talk. God Bless you and your husband during this very difficult time. Stay strong and take care of yourself.

Dawn

mousa

Dear Brenda,

I agree with all that Dawn wrote. Does your husband have a PICC? Even if not, he perhaps could be fed intravenously with Vitrimix or similar? Can he take oral fluids? If so, Boost and Ensure are good. A pain pump seems sensible to me, too. Be with your husband as much as possible but do take some time for yourself. It's OK to cry. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband and family and with the doctor and the hospice folks that they be guided to do what's right for your husband. Love and hugs to you all

tilliewillie · Regular Joined: 22 Aug 2005 Posts: 12

First let me say you have my sincerest sympathies and I will add you to my prayer list.
Secondly, there are no better people on earth than Hospice caretakers. They are awesome and there for the entire family. Don't be afraid to ask them for anything.
The main concern right now should be making sure your husband is not in any pain. The pain pump is what worked for my brother.
I think doctors are hesitant to predict a time frame because nobody really knows. (They told my Dad he only had a few days, yet he lived another 3 months...they told my brother 6 months to a year and he passed away 2 weeks later)
I hope you have a lot of support from family and friends...I agree totally that you need some time for yourself too. And I hope you can get some comfort from the people on this forum.
Please let us know how you all are doing.

Brenda · Regular Joined: 02 Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: GA

Hi. I only have a minute, but I'll try to answer some questions. No, he doesn't have a PICC line. He did have one and it got infected and caused blood clots and had to be removed. He had a Groshong Cath put in and a couple of weeks ago, it, too became infected and had to be removed. He can get a few liquids down, but nothing thick. Boost and Ensure is too thick. We have tried them. Right now, he can drink Carnation Instant Breakfast, diluted about 4-1. The doctor called tonight and is still working on some other meds to add to what he already takes. He is supposed to call something in tomorrow. He has had the morphine pump when in the hospital, but they haven't mentioned it for home. They are giving him 600 mg morphine a day and 100mg liquid instant release that he can take every hour if needed. Also ibufrofen, 600 mg.
Thank you all for your support.

Brenda · Regular Joined: 02 Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: GA

It has been a couple of weeks since I've been on here, but I wanted to let you know that my husband passed away on Saturday. (Feb.25) I appreciate the concern from the ones here that did respond to my questions. I pray that others will have a better outcome with this horrible disease.
Thank you,
Brenda

brainman

Oh, Brenda, I am so sorry! I will not tell you that I know how you feel because I have never lost a mate to cancer. However, I can imagine. I also can imagine that you are in need of friends and care. Be assured that you have both among us... not always as prompt as we would like, yet we do care.

May you find peace and comfort during this time of loss.
_________________
Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/

mousa

Dear Brenda,
I am so sorry to hear the news of your husband's passing. He went through a very tough illness. You will miss his physical presence but his spirit will always be with you and you can speak with him at any time We wish that our loved ones could always be with us physically but that's not possible. I send prayers that your friends will comfort you and your family. May God bless and keep you close to Him.
Love and hugs,

Val

anewdawn · Regular Joined: 29 Jan 2006 Posts: 30

Dear Brenda,

I was so sad to learn of your husbands passing. I know the road ahead of you will be long and hard. I hope and pray that God wraps his arms around you and holds you close during this very difficult time. I lost my father to a very sudden and tragic illness. The only thing that kept me going was knowing that he would no longer suffer. Please know we are all here for you should you need to talk and grieve.

Dawn

	Cancer Forums Forum Index -> Stomach and Esophageal Cancer Forum	All times are GMT - 5 Hours Goto page 1, 2 Next
Page 1 of 2

A website for discussions about any type of cancer, including lung cancer, breast cancer, mesothelioma, prostate cancer, laryngeal cancer, leukemia, lymphoma, multiple myeloma and others