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Best ways to lend support? What is this ?

 
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Toni_01915
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Joined: 30 Aug 2007
Posts: 3
Location: Massachusetts
PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2007 8:01 am    Post subject: Best ways to lend support? Reply with quote
Hello All,

First, I appreciate you taking the time to read my posting.

Last November, my partner's mother was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. It was (and is) a long road of worry, fear, and the like. Both her and I did our best to lend continued support to her mother. After doctors told her she was in remission, the cancer has come back, and the chemo has begun again. It came back quickly, so it took us all by surprise.

Here's my question ... My partner and I just aren't "together" anymore, if that makes sense. I know she is consumed by her mother (I would be too, and trust me, I have been as well), but I don't know what I can do to show her or make her believe I feel her pain too. Am I being selfish? I ask myself that question every day. Am I asking too much from my partner? I feel like we hate each other, and I don't know what to do. Should I let her go so she can deal with her mother, and have no worry for me, and my needs?

Again, thank you and your thoughts are appreciated.

T
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Love is everything it's cracked up to be … It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for.
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brainman
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Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 3008
Location: Tennessee
PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2007 11:25 am    Post subject: Re: Best ways to lend support? Reply with quote
Toni, you do not sound like you are being selfish. You sound like you are searching for was to express your care and support to your partner during this very difficult time in her life.

The best thing you can to for her is to listen to her and be patient with her. She will have some very difficult days/months ahead of her. She needs to know that you are there for her.

You and your partner are in my thoughts and prayers. Keep us informed.
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Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
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