Dad with Cancer, should I cancel my wedding?

shazb123 · New User Joined: 24 Jun 2008 Posts: 1

I have been feeling low this last two weeks. My Dad (52yrs) was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer which spread into his spine & other bones in Nov06. He was given 12-18months to live. He had hormone therapy & radiotherapy which got him back on his feet for a while. Then at the start of May, he was readmitted to hospital with more pain & has been there since. The doctors have been managing his pain quite well but he still wasn't well enough to go home.
Last weekend, he took a bad turn in the night & we nearly lost him, is what the hospital said. He had to be given a blood transfusion & put on oxygen. They say he has fluid on his lungs. He has put on a lot of weight & looks swollen from the tablets? They told me this morning that he got a fever last night from an unknown origin.
Did I mention that Im getting married in september & now I fear that he won't be there to see me.
Is this the end or could he recover?
I don't know whether to cancel my wedding or to carry on with it. Im so confused at the minute Sad

simplyklb

You should continue to plan your wedding.

Let me share something with you... My parents were both diagnosed this past May with lung cancer. My oldest niece's dad needs a kidney transplant. She was getting married on June 14th. My niece was going back and forth on the date because her dad's transplant. She set it up and lo and behold, my parents were diagnosed. Then she found out her dad needed his transplant this year. It was a horrible time for her.. What should have been the happiest time of her life was turning out to be a very bittersweet time in her life. We were not sure if my dad was going to be able to attend the wedding or not. My dad has been pretty sick since his diagnosis. My dad was able to attend the wedding on June 14th. He stayed a lot longer than I thought he would. It was one of the easiest weddings I have ever been to.

Kristi
_________________
Dad - Andy, 70, diagnosed with SCLC in May 2008
2/20/38 - 10/15/08 Fly high, Dad!
Mom - Jackie, 67, diagnosed with NSCLC in May 2008

ksplat

Hello Shaz

I am so sorry to hear about your Dad's Prostate Cancer & current hospitalisation. I'm not familiar with this type of cancer...I will hold you & your Dad up in my prayers. This must be a very painful time for you with the added stress of wedding preparations. I am so sorry you find yourself in this position.

You should (if you haven't already) talk to your Dad's medical team/nurse about his prognosis. They should have a better idea as to how your Dad's cancer will progress from here? Is the hospital/Drs talking about some kind of chemotherapy/treatment for your Father? Have you spoken to your Dad about your concerns re your wedding? If you haven't I'm thinking you should, he will be able to offer his insight & I'm sure would feel blessed & loved that you have opened up to him! Often in these situations families don't open up enough & many things are left unsaid.

I do pray you are able to find some peace for yourself over your wedding concerns.

Thinking of you
Cheers, Angie.
_________________
Brother diagnosed with GBMIV Feb 07
Treatment: Radiotherapy, Temodal, Gliadel Wafers, Dexamethasone, Keppra, Dilantin, Clexane
Went to our Heavenly Father after a 19mth battle,, 47 years young.
23 Sep 2008
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=19227

"Without Faith We Have Nothing"

ChemoMan

Hi

Don't change the date. It will give your Dad something to look forward to. The example Kristi gave, parents hanging on for a wedding despite poor prognosis, are quite common. I also agree with Angie that you should talk to your dad about this as well, for all the reasons she mentioned

Good luck
_________________
Age 52
Diffuse Large B cell Lymphoma
Stage 2a
Finished six cycles of R chop 21 26th May 2008
Officially in remission 9th July 2008
Remission confirmed 1st October 2008
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=9620

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