In Shock

fayesfla · New User Joined: 25 Jul 2007 Posts: 1

My sister went to get a check up. They found that her blood pressure was high. After doing more tests they found that she had a brain tumor behind her left eye. My family & I were on vacation July 4th when I recieved a call from her. She told me she was getting surgery to remove it. They removed the turmor. They found some spots on her lungs, in her back and in her hip. She was told that she was in stage 4. She has had no headaches or been in pain. They made arrangements for her to go to a treatment center. I called the treatment center and they told me that no one was there by that name. I have been calling she will not answer her phone. I can't reach anyone to find out what is going on. She could have decided not to get any treatment. Looking for support.

satori22 · Regular Joined: 28 May 2007 Posts: 13

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. It is so hard and not having information and being cut off like that makes it so much harder. My boyfriend did something very similar when he was diagnosed. He cut contact with everyone, even moving far away and keeping his condition very secret. It was horrible and very difficult but he did it because he was so overwhelmed by the news himself. Like your sister he seemed healthy and was going in only for seemingly inconsequential back pain that he thought was caused by working out too much. He just wanted to get away from everything and everyone he knew so he could deal with it on his own. He said goodbye to me and left, but I kept trying to contact him, writing him all the time when he wouldn't let me see him. Eventually he responded and I stood by him until the end. He pushed me away several times for what he believed was my own good---he was trying to protect me. But i hung in there and in the end he was glad I did because he needed love and support. I think your sister might be similar. She may just need time to digest this and deal with this awful news on her own before she can face her family. Until she reaches that place try to be there for her in whatever ways you can, write her, keep calling, maybe even stop by and see her. It may be what she needs, but understand that this is so much harder for her and she should be able to face it however she needs to. Give her time and space but don't give up trying to be there for her. As much as she may think she doesn't, she needs your love now more than ever. I'm very sorry this has happened to you and I wish the best for you both.

brainman · Posted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 3:53 am Post subject: Re: In Shock

Hi fayesfla, I am so sorry about your sister! It sound like the cancer is very advanced?! Have they said what kind of cancer it is? Is it primary lung cancer with mets to the brain and bones?

It is not uncommon for treatment centers not to divulge the identity of their patients. In fact, that is the law! I know that leaves you in the dark and being in the dark just sucks. Keep trying to contact her through others. She may not know that she needs to tell the treatment center that it is OK to talk to you.
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Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
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