My dad has secondary liver cancer...I am so sad

karolynca · Experienced user Joined: 13 May 2008 Posts: 51

I go back to work today...I don't want to go, the condolences, the explanations, the "what happened"...I am tired of it...honestly. But I guess is something that I eventually have to deal with so better deal with it now
_________________
Dad ~ Passed away from Multiorgan failure due to secondary liver cancer on July 2008

http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=34365

pl101 · Regular Joined: 16 Jul 2008 Posts: 10

Yes, all the special days and special places will be hard. In time I hope also we think about the good times we shared with our loved ones during special ocassions and places. For now until I am ready I will cry for mom if I feel so with no shame or embarassment. My mom loved growing and eating Chinese vegetables. When ever I visit her at the cemetery, I will be bringing a stock of one of her favorites instead of flowers.

In

It will be hard, But i'm sure after the first day or two, people will leave you be. Worse come to worse tell them first. Get it out in the open and then it will be quicker for them to move on from your thoughts.

X In Good Luck.

A lovely thought pl101.
_________________
Thinking of you Inica

*Administrator*

~Nose Cancer~
~Car Accident- Broken Back, Ribs, Spleen
Sternum~
~Continous Cervical Cancer~

My Story-
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=6731

Smile

9 Lives and still kicking Smile

karolynca · Experienced user Joined: 13 May 2008 Posts: 51

It was a tough day yesterday, I went back to work and despite the fact that the environment asks you to be normal...you just can't be. I miss him, as plain as it sounds, I feel like all of the sudden I am alone and I have almost no family (just my mom). I am a very family person and although my husband's family is so good to me...it is still not my family, am I making sense?. I slept very well last night for the first time...I even dreamt, it is just waking up what hurts because then you are comfronted with reality...it plain sucks.
_________________
Dad ~ Passed away from Multiorgan failure due to secondary liver cancer on July 2008

http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=34365

mymaria · Experienced user Joined: 28 Feb 2008 Posts: 57

karolyn,

My heart goes out to you. Try to be strong and take it day by day. If you have to, if you don't already, try to spend as much time as you can with your mother. I haven't read all of the posts, but this can be very helpful for the both of you. Do you keep in touch with your sister regularly while she is overseas? There are very inexpensive ways to do so nowadays. Especially if you have a computer. Call?

I know what you mean about not being your family. I live in another state with my wife's family nearby and I often wish it was my family or that my family was here as well.

Love your way...God bless and I am sorry for your loss.
_________________
Dallas, TX

karolynca · Experienced user Joined: 13 May 2008 Posts: 51

Thank you all...yes indeed as the days pass by and as people stop visiting, you start feeling the emptyness...Saturday I went to a baby store and saw a lady with her little girl and a man....she said "Hey baby...let's have fun watching toys with grandpa", my heart sunk and my eyes were full of tears right there...I cannot erase that scene from my mind and I just cannot stand the thought that I won't be able to live that with my own dad...it just breaks my heart....
_________________
Dad ~ Passed away from Multiorgan failure due to secondary liver cancer on July 2008

http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=34365

karolynca · Experienced user Joined: 13 May 2008 Posts: 51

Sorry I have been MIA, it seems in a way I have good days when I think I am really taking some steps towards healing but then I just go into this big depression mode and all the steps are taken back . I am already almost 35 weeks pregnant, I am expected to give birth at the end of October and all I can think of is that my dad won't meet my little baby, he won't be able to hold him/her or to do normal grandpa-grandkid thing.

Pregnancy is going fine though, my appointments are 2 weeks apart now and I think from next appt. on they will be just one week apart.

I still don't know how I am going to make it thru birth and Xmas without daddy here
_________________
Dad ~ Passed away from Multiorgan failure due to secondary liver cancer on July 2008

http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=34365

	Cancer Forums Forum Index -> Coping and Support	All times are GMT - 5 Hours Goto page Previous 1, 2, 3
Page 3 of 3

A website for discussions about any type of cancer, including lung cancer, breast cancer, mesothelioma, prostate cancer, laryngeal cancer, leukemia, lymphoma, multiple myeloma and others