What content/questions to include in Journal for my Brother

ksplat

Hi Friends,

I am wanting to compile a journal/tribute to my Brother - Mark who is currently on the GBMIV journey. Diagnosis Feb 07 & still fighting hard.
As mentioned in previous threads (Brainman-Jim has talked about it) I know there are some of you who have done this type of thing already (or their family members have done it for them) & I am wanting feedback from all of you.
Your suggestions on the "wording" & "type" of questions that we can ask him about; that will leave us, his family, grandchildren & friends with great memories of his life, should it ever end. I'm not being morbid here, just practical & as his loving Sister I would dearly love to compile a book of his memories, anecdotes & experiences as a tribute to him.

Thanks in advance for your input. Cheers, Aussie Angie.
_________________
Brother diagnosed with GBMIV Feb 07
Treatment: Radiotherapy, Temodal, Gliadel Wafers, Dexamethasone, Keppra, Dilantin, Clexane
Went to our Heavenly Father after a 19mth battle,, 47 years young.
23 Sep 2008
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=19227

"Without Faith We Have Nothing"

brainman

I think you are referring to the book I have called: "A Father's Legacy: Your Life Story in Your Own Words." It has a lot of questions divided into months. It has general, open ended questions like:

Tell me about the house you lived in as a child.

What was your favorite subject in school? How did studying it change your life?

How did you and Mommy meet? How soon after that did you know she was "the one"?

What is it about your job/profession that drew you to it in the first place? How do you feel about it now?

Did you family go on family vacations? Tell me about your favorite vacation.

What were your favorite foods as a child?

If you could do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone, what would that be?

Tell me about the school or University that you attended. What did you major in?

"What was...", "Tell me about...", and "How..." are better questions than "Where..." or "When..." questions. Avoid "Why..." questions because they tend to put people on the defencive thinking they need to defend their actions, choices, likes or dislikes.

Oh yes, and "Did you..." questions or other closed ended questions should be followed up with an open ended one. You do not want a list of facts but a life story Wink

None of the questions I suggested came from the book although I am sure that at a subconscious level the book did influence my suggestions.
_________________
Jim
Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendroglioma grade 3, same location.
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2405
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2528
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 3: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Twitter: @JimHawkins54

LostMyFriend

What a nice thing for you to do for your brother and especially, for his family. I have taken several "oral histories" as part of a archives group in which I belong. Even though the "open ended" questions are the most ideal and what you are shooting for (as Jim has said), sometimes they are just too broad for people when you are getting started with that person. Sometimes, depending on the person, I have found that it is first good to sit down with them and make a time line. The time line marks significant events throughout his/her life and then the memories can flow around those dates.

Good luck with your project. Please post back how it is going.

Darwin

If you find it too diffcult to write or tape and transcribe this then perhaps you might like to get a computer program we have found.

My ex has a voice recognition program on his computer and he talks into it and it types what he has said. It's a great way to 'write' your memories and also a much less tiring way for him to write emails to his friends.
_________________
In Perth Western australia - Ex husband's diagnosis was January 2006, stage IV bowel cancer with mets to liver and lungs. March 2006 Bowel re-section, then two+ years of continuous chemo, folfox then folfirri with two years of Avastin. Then MAX chemo. Had radiation to pelvic area and radioactive SIRT spheres injected through the portal vein into the liver. Prognosis 22 months he lived for 36 months and did a few very long road trips in that time which he enjoyed.

Ron · Posted: Wed Apr 16, 2008 7:02 am Post subject: Status???

Ksplat,

I know it's been a while, but I'm a new user and facing a similar situation. How is your brother doing and how did the memory book turn out? I may do the same thing. I really think I should do something like that for my father and even for myself so our family history doesn't get lost for my kids/grandkids.

Thank you.....Ron

ksplat · Posted: Wed May 21, 2008 3:44 pm Post subject: Re: Status on journal

Hello all

I finally started the journal/album for my Bro last weekend! I have collected so many photos in the past few months it will be hard to decide which ones to scrapbook?

The organisation of this journal has been a "journey" in itself! Mark has never been one to be photographed (in his adult life) so the challenges have been huge & I've been in contact with relations & family friends, up & down the east coast of Aust, asking for old photos. The "old" black & whites from when we were kids are real GEMS & as I said this has been a "journey" but a lovely journey, reminiscing.

I still haven't figured out what type of "medium" I will use to include questions for my Bro in the journal, I'm sure this will come as I continue creating colourful memories of Mark's life story.

Cheers, Angie.
_________________
Brother diagnosed with GBMIV Feb 07
Treatment: Radiotherapy, Temodal, Gliadel Wafers, Dexamethasone, Keppra, Dilantin, Clexane
Went to our Heavenly Father after a 19mth battle,, 47 years young.
23 Sep 2008
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=19227

"Without Faith We Have Nothing"

In

Hi, Ange

Great to hear. It is going to be so hard to work out what stays and goes. Is there anyway you can have some one make a slid show on DvD for you. With music and even your voice stating what is going on in the picture. It's amazing what they can do theses days
_________________
Thinking of you Inica

~Nose Cancer~
~Car Accident- Broken Back, Ribs, Spleen
Sternum~
~Continous Cervical Cancer~

My Story-
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=6731

Smile

9 Lives and still kicking Smile

dano

Hi Angie;
You got me thinking.
I started a life story back just after I was diagnosed, then lost motivation, and started feeling better, lol. But I was afraid of writing some thing that sounded dumb. I'm going to get the book that Jim talked about, sounds like some good ideas. Medium wise, one saving the information a pics to back it up on computer and disk, I have a Mac so all that comes easy. This will allow my boys a chance to use the info in either a multimedia show, slide show or video for a memorial service. My oldest is a video editor and cameraman, he video tapes weddings on the side and has packages for that. A memorial service could be done the same way, combining video interviews with still pics. Then second thing I'm thinking of is through Apple, they offer the chance to take your pics and writings and put them in a picture book, I think that sounds cool.

So how is the project going? Look forward to an up date;
Dan
_________________
55 year old male, Diagnosed Nov. 9,2007 with NSCLC IV with Mets to the lymphs and brain
Had full brain radiation treatment in Jan 08 treatments now every 4 weeks with Alimta, taking Lovenox for blood clots, Now working full time
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=9993

ksplat · Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2008 6:55 pm Post subject: A journal update

Hi Dan
I am still plugging away at the journal, each day. I could have taken the "picture book" option but decided I wanted the album to be an original. The only problem with this is I feel like I'm "racing the clock". Bro isn't too good at the mo & is back in hospital. His eyesight is also worsening & I become fretful that he won't be able to see the photos or read the journalling I have done.
I'm very happy to hear you have found renewed motivation in doing your life story for your boys. The computer is a fantastic tool for this subject.
Thinking of you Dan, I do hope all is well with you? Take care.
Cheers, Angie.
_________________
Brother diagnosed with GBMIV Feb 07
Treatment: Radiotherapy, Temodal, Gliadel Wafers, Dexamethasone, Keppra, Dilantin, Clexane
Went to our Heavenly Father after a 19mth battle,, 47 years young.
23 Sep 2008
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=19227

"Without Faith We Have Nothing"

Ackles · Regular Joined: 12 May 2009 Posts: 22

Hi ksplat,
I wish you all the luck in your endeavor. I just wish I thought of doing this for my Uncle before he passed. We did try to make a photo collection and that's when I realized that I hardly any pictures of family members. So here's my advice for everyone out there: always bring your camera to family events, this way years latter you won't regret not catching those perfect moments.

ksplat, keep us posted with your project! My thoughts are with you and your brother.

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