getting worse

mandy · Regular Joined: 03 Apr 2008 Posts: 25

i had a call from my sister last night, apparently mum went to the doctors with chest pains and he called ambulance, she had x ray at hospital and was told lung cancer has grown (this is in A/E) anyway apparently she caught the bus home and im assuming she phoned my younger sister and told her what had happened, she allso mentioned coughing up small amounts of blood
Im confused about this can accident and emergancy docs say the tumor has grown, would they have let her home on the bus
why didnt she call one of us...........we all have cars and would have dropped what we was doing at the drop of a hat
im seeing mum today and finding out whats going on
im a mess and im fuming as to why im not being told everything ..............ok im the type that breaks down when a goldfish dies but for gods sake im her daughter i should be told
all i know is it is advanced non small cell...........if i ever ask for results she says shes not had them
she did have MRI on tuesday for headaches
ill kjeep you posted

dano · Posted: Sat Jun 13, 2009 3:38 am Post subject: Re: getting worse

Hi Mandy, do you think there is a chance that your parents could be confused to? Cancer words seem like a foreign language to many, it is to me.
God Bless
Dan
_________________
55 year old male, Diagnosed Nov. 9,2007 with NSCLC IV with Mets to the lymphs and brain
Had full brain radiation treatment in Jan 08 treatments now every 4 weeks with Alimta, taking Lovenox for blood clots, Now working full time
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=9993

pbj11 · Site Admin Joined: 12 May 2007 Posts: 2403

Oh dear!! I'm surprised they didn't make sure she was released with a ride home, but who knows what goes on in some of these hospitals. Rolling Eyes

It sounds like she may be in denial Mandy. Maybe not total denial, but she doesn't want to talk about it. It's so difficult for family members when the person with the cancer doesn't want to talk, but that's their prerogative. I understand and am sorry for this latest news.

Keep us posted. I know how upsetting this is for you.

Hugs and God bless,
PBJ
_________________
Husband diagnosed with NSCLC Stage IV. (Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer) Fought & lived 2 1/2 years with multiple lines of treatment.

Post describing our battle: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=7026&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0

melkissa · Posted: Sat Jun 13, 2009 8:21 pm Post subject: Re: getting worse

I agree with pbj11. Also, she may want to sugar coat things to you or prolong telling you because she fears your reaction. Personally, if I thought I could handle it, I would ask to go to the doctor with her for a follow up or test results appointment. I would also constantly reassure her that you will be strong for her and she can lean on you. You might cry, but you guys will figure out a plan to fight it or make her time left as comfortable as possible. She probably feels very vulnerable and doesn't want to worry or be a burden to her children. I am so sorry about your moms condition. It is very hard to watch your parent suffer and go through such a difficult situation. Please find strength and safe haven here anytime to vent or look for guidance. I am thinking positive thoughts for you and your family!
_________________
My dad was diag w/nsclc stage 4 & mets to spine & hips on 11/08 at age 43. Large mass on R lung & collapsed L lung. No surgery so chemo & rad 5d/wk. No results. 4/09 rushed to the hospital b/c breathing issues. Hooked up to o2 & treated for infection. Released when o2 levels were good w/help from Hospice at home. In Hospice as of 6/2/09. Passed 6/10/09. Missing you forever daddy.

mandy · Regular Joined: 03 Apr 2008 Posts: 25

thanks for the support its good to know theres here where i can talk and people understsnd
mum came over yesterday and she looked ok, i asked what had happened and she said
the cancer has taken over her entire left lung which is causing digestion proplems and the pain she suffered was like idegestion, she was put on heart monitor and everything was ok
she is due to see her cancer nurse in 3 weeks and was thinking of asking if they could remove entire left lung (not sure if thats possible as it has spread but to where i dont know)
last she she was told they would not operate if they couldnt cure her as it is a big operation, i told her to ask for more chemo but she said they wont until the end as her kidneys was not strong enough (her kidneys have improved) radiothereapy is only offered once so thats being held off until the last minute, well then my sister jumped in and said where she is next of kin she will be the one going to see her nurse, that annoyed me as im the oldest and she cannot be trusted to tell the truth at all but shes allways been a mummys girl
as for being let out the hospial to catch a bus they asked mum if she was ok getting home and she said yes she didnt say she was getting the bus
i had a go at her (well you know) about her not calling us as i allways have my mobile (cell phone on me and she said my mobile was off and no one was at home, my son was off school sick and i allso checked the last called in numbers, anyway i gave her my inlaws number and told her to call them if she cant get hold of us and she is to call us day or night no matter what, we can be at her house before an ambulance as we live literally 4 minute walk
i know i worry but i would rather be told
i do feel she is keeping something from us but i dont know what, she knows she can tell me anything no matter how bad it is ok id bawl my eyes out and be a mess but what son/daughter wouldnt
anyway ill keep you posted
thanks guys this is soooooooooooo hard and staying strong for the kids is hard, im allso suffering the stress of it all now as im going down quite bad with my condition

mandy

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