How bad is it if

Son in Law · New User Joined: 25 Jun 2009 Posts: 4

The Dr has given you 2 months to live and basically says not to bother with radiation treatment. (bisopsy was out of the question)

at the time of the visit to the specialist the tumor at the frontal lobe was supposed to be the size of a tennis ball, my mother in law is taking steroids to help tumor not increase in size and prevent pain, but we don't see any real levels of decline (been 3 weeks)

I'm not trying to sound morbid here, but shouldn't there be some decline if she only has 2 months to live...( I know, not exact science) but we want to try to set up some sort of strategy of taking our holiday time from work at the best time to be with her when she needs it most.

Roman957 · Regular Joined: 22 Feb 2009 Posts: 27

I am so sorry to hear of your situation. As far as my experience goes, you are very correct that trying to predict "the end" is not an exact science. Every patient is different. However, I found an excellent website that is run by the daughter of a man who had glioblastoma multiforme, that deals specifically with end care and hospice. It is very informative but written in a caring and sensitive way. I highly recommend it. It can be found at www.brainhospice.com

My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Roman

brainman · Posted: Fri Jun 26, 2009 8:41 pm Post subject: Re: How bad is it if

Son in Law, I am so sorry to hear about your MIL's cancer and poor prognosis. My mother died just two months after her tumor was diagnosed. She opted for no treatment. It was not until the last week or so that we saw any significant change in her. Until then, she was still pretty much taking care of her own needs... at least as much as she had before her diagnosis. During those last days, hospice was a great help to us and to her.

I count it a blessing that brain cancer usually does not cause much suffering to the patient. It is much harder on the families. I can say this because I have been on both sides as a patient and then as a care provider.

You and your MIL are in my thoughts and prayers.
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Jim
Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
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Son in Law · New User Joined: 25 Jun 2009 Posts: 4

thanx for the link, this is a great site.

kenobewan · Regular Joined: 10 Jun 2009 Posts: 25

As they say in Opera circles, its not over until the large lady sings.

Although I have a low grade tumor, my approach has been proactive. If something sounds wrong I question it and get second opinions. So if I was told there was two months left, I wouldn't be making arrangements just yet.

Don't get me wrong, if you are satisfied with this opinion I respect that. I'm more of a fighter than a lover Wink

. All I'm saying there may be other options. While I only could read your words, your post resonated with me and many others who want to fight on even when the end may seem close.

While its not our job to decide when our time is up, I have seen too many sad things to go 'quietly into that good night'. Especially the way that older people are treated in the health system. First sign that things are getting rough the doctors are making 'arrangements'.

I suggest that you do what you feel is right while respecting her wishes. At least I would want to know what all the options are.

All the best!

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