Dad Dying Young

amakis · Regular Joined: 01 Mar 2006 Posts: 39

I am a 27 year old mom who is losing her 61 year old father to cancer. He had throat cancer 4.5 years ago and yesterday was informed that it is back and was told that he'd be lucky to make it until Christmas. These last two days have been perhaps the worst days I've ever experienced. I'm having a terrible time coping with this reality. Right now my feelings are of sadness and fear of the unknown. For anybody who has experience with [b]Stage 3B Squamous Cell Carcinoma in the lungs and throat[/b]I would love and really appreciate any advise and even some information on what to expect. Crying or Very sad

happyheart · New User Joined: 01 Mar 2006 Posts: 6

Amakis,

First let me begin by saying, I am so sorry for you, your family and your father.

Know one knows how long each one of us has to live on this earth, except for our heavenly father. I have had so many different people even those with cancer say they were given an incredibally short time to live and they are living, today.

There are alot of natural herbs that also help in the fight of cancer. Diet has a great deal to do with it. Look up "NONONONO" in the search engine and you will see there are many people who have drank this tea and was healed healed. While you are looking that up, check out "The Budwig" diet. It consists of Flax oil and cottage cheese. Even changing the diet to one of alkaline foods and avoiding acidic foods can make a huge difference in the growth of cancer. Cancer can not live in an alkaline invironment. I am sure if you know this or not, but there are a couple of drugs that have just been approved by the FDA that has doubled the time left in terminally ill cancer patients.

As you see, alot can be done to inhibit the growth of cancer. For more information on his type of cancer, google it. There will be more information than you will want to know and sometimes this can be bad so don't read too much. It is scary and is very sad. My husband also has cancer. Take care of yourself physically and emotionally now and in the days to come. God bless you all.

amakis · Regular Joined: 01 Mar 2006 Posts: 39

Thank you for your kind words, they mean a lot. I have actually been looking at the internet a lot and have uncovered some good stories and some not so good stories. I'm trying so hard to stay positive. I plan to go with my parents on Monday to my dad's oncology appointment. Are there any questions that I should ask, or is there anything I should alert myself for? I just can't get the words my dad said when he was given the news- "I'm saddest that I won't get to see Madelyn grow up". Madelyn is my 10 month old daughter and is the first and only grandchild as of now. My parents watch her during the day while I work. My dad "Papa" has grown so attached to Madelyn that he is having a hard time with the realization of not seeing her grow into a beautiful young lady. Speaking of work, I am a third grade teacher, and the past couple of days have been so hard to do my job. To stand in front of a bunch of 9 year olds and just break down is not enjoyable. I hope and pray that I get stronger, I feel like such a week person.

brainman · Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 10:06 pm Post subject: Re: Dad Dying Young

Amakis, I am so sorry for you and your father. I do hope and pray that he will be able to experience a good quality of life.

I am moving this thread into the stomach and esophageal forum since you might be able to find more people who can identify with you there. But be assured that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your father Monday when he goes back to the oncologist.

The first time I had cancer, I had to continue working. I was fortunate to work in the same hospital where my doctor’s office was located and to have a very sympathetic boss who let me work at my own pace. I can’t imagine how difficult it is for you to have to keep up the pace with a class of 3rd graders while worrying about your father’s condition! May you find the strength you need to carry on.
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amakis · Regular Joined: 01 Mar 2006 Posts: 39

I have decided to collect my nerves and attend my dad's oncology appointment with him this coming Monday. I am hoping to get a better idea of what is to come. So far the doctors that have consulted on my dad's case have said Stage IIIB Squamous Cell Carcinoma of the Lungs and Throat.
Does anyone have any advise on any questions I should ask? Or perhaps are there any key words I should be attentive to?

rlee · Site Admin Joined: 15 Jan 2006 Posts: 245

Your father had advanced NSCLC Stage IIIB. This is usually considered unresectable and chemotherapy combined with radiation is a common treatment plan. If he responds well, some patients can undergo surgery. You may want to inquiry if the medical team thinks this is a possibility. Overall the cure rate is the minority. Now is the time to ask about these questions, so I stronly encourage you and your father to write a list of questions, everything, and bring them to the visit. Your medical team is best equipped to answer your questions.

RLee, MD
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Any information provided is NOT intended to provide specific medical advice to users but rather to provide users with information to help them better understand their health condition and related care. All readers are strongly encouraged to consult with a qualified physician for answers to their personal medical questions.

amakis · Regular Joined: 01 Mar 2006 Posts: 39

I looked back and saw that my dad's diagnosis may appear to be a bit confusing. 4.5 years ago my dad was diagnosed with throat cancer. He underwent both chemo. and radiation and had surgery. After all that, the cancer went into remission.
Now, March 2006, after a bout of pnemonia, a chest x-ray and a needle biopsy confirmed squamous cell carcinoma of the lungs and throat and possibly stage IV.
I will ask if surgery is a possibility after successful radiation and chemotherapy. Are there any chemotherapy treaments that you know of that have a higher success rate with this type of cancer?

samo18 · New User Joined: 22 Mar 2006 Posts: 1

Hey guys, Im glad I found this site, I've really wanted to let my feeling out latelt and if any of you have any advice on how to deal with this? Well for starters i'm 18 and almost finished grade 12! excited about that. Well during last summer I found out my dad had prostate cancer but it wasn't anything to worry about...but when I went over to visit during chritmas( my parents are divorced) they noticed the cancer was still there and its been getting worse...I recieved horrible news that my dad didn't know if he could make it to my grad since he didn't know when he'd start chemo...but not all sad! I found out hes not getting chemo for awhile and he can come in May Very Happy

...if he couldn't have come, I probably would have broken down, I mean I couldn't stand living that my own dad didn't come to my grad.

Talking about how my parents are split up..well i had alot of anger towards my dad when i was youngar..he made me and my brother upset alot and didn't seem to want us in our lives...he didn't want to take us when they split up...and recently me and my dad had gotten really close cuz I guess now im an adult and felt like he wanted me know. I know this is cheesy but pretty much every night when i was youngar, i prayed that my dad would someday want me and know that i know he does...i find out hes dying Sad

so its crushed me really hard when what ive always wanted is going to be gone just like that again. Like i feel when i was a kid i had no control to stop him leaving me and now that he has cancer...i feel like im a kid again and can't stop him leaving me again. Ive just had so much anger and love for him I just don't know what to do...I can't handle that hes leaving a second time...it was hard enough the first time.

So yea..anyone who can help me, id really appreciate it
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