Father recently diagnosed

lespds · New User Joined: 29 Oct 2007 Posts: 2 Location: Florida

My 82 y.o. father was recently diagnosed (beginning of October) with metastatic melanoma. CT scans showed diffuse cancer in the lungs with chest area lymph node involvement. He had a bronchial wash and biopsy that confirmed melanoma. Original melanoma on his upper back was approx. 5 years ago. He has had an MRI - negative, and PET scan which showed areas in the liver and arm pit area. He was recently hospitalized for pnuemonia, which has since resolved. He had a consulting oncolgist while in the hospital who did the CT scan and MRI. His opinion was that treatment was not advised because of the widespread involvement of both lungs and chest lymph nodes, the type of cancer, and my father's age. He referred my dad to Hospice. My dad susbsequently had a PET scan at the VA hospital, and that oncologist also indicated he did not recommend treatment. My father is seeing a third oncologist in two weeks. Is it likely that he will hear anything different from the third doctor? I was present when the first oncologist spoke with my dad, and the second one called me on the phone after speaking with my dad, but neither of them seemed to convey to my dad that his situation is grave and neither gave any type of time frame. My mother died of cancer two years ago around this same time and her oncologists, while very gentle about it, made sure she understood that she was terminal and that her time was limited. Am I being overly pessimistic in thinking that my dad does not have much time left? He is currently doing pretty well, is able to continue to live on his own and pretty much continue his normal routine. I am grateful that he is not in any pain, but I am unclear about what to expect since the doctors seem reluctant to say much beyond the fact that they do not recommend any treatment. My main objective is to be sure that my dad is comfortable and safe. But it's hard to plan when no one seems to be able or want to say what the progression might be. Any suggestions?
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Pam

brainman · Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:44 pm Post subject: Re: Father recently diagnosed

Hi Pam, I am so sorry about your father's cancer. You have really had a hard time with cancer! Both of my parents also died due to cancer.

Some oncologists are just better communicators than others. The details you give are not enough even to speculate on a time frame. You should ask your father's medical team if they think your father is terminal at this point.

Since he still is relatively healthy at this point, you really should try to make the most of this time. Ask your father if there is anything he what to do, anyone he would like to see or speak with, or any place he would like to go. Then, do your best to make those wishes come true. You have an opportunity to be his personal "Dream Factory" Wink

.

I hope and pray that you and your father have many happy days ahead.
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Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/

lespds · New User Joined: 29 Oct 2007 Posts: 2 Location: Florida

I was under the impression that referral to Hospice was an indication of a terminal condition. I expect that my dad will have the third oncologist contact me, so I will see if I can get some more definitive information at that time. Thanks for your response.
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Pam

brainman · Posted: Tue Oct 30, 2007 12:25 pm Post subject: Re: Father recently diagnosed

Ooops Pam, I missed that detail in your original post. Yes, a doctor will only make a referral to hospice if he/she thinks that the patient has six or less months to live. That does not mean that after six months they will drop your father from their care. They will continue to provide services to your father as long as he needs it.
_________________
Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/

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