View Full Version : My grandfather has liver cancer. Can someone please help?

09-21-2007, 10:43 AM
Okay, let me start out by saying this. My Papa is scared to death of a doctor. He is worse than a baby. He has never been until a month ago. Well needless to say we went to the er and they ran a ct on him. The doctor said he had a kidney stone that she knew of and seen a few different spots in the scan that she thought was cancer but she couldn't diagnose him with it. He had also been bleeding from his rectum. The doc was more concerned about that than anything. He ended up then going home and was suppose to follow up. Well he never did. He could not take the pain anymore so he went back to er and they submitted him. Well to make a long story short he keeps saying that he wants to die without having to suffer so bad. He keeps saying it is his time to go. We find out that he has colon cancer, liver cancer, and cancer in his Lymph nodes. He has the colon surgery and they took 1/3 of his colon out. The cancer was so big on his colon that it was hitting everything else around it. Yeah he was in MAJOR pain. This pain has been going on for six months but no one could do anything with him. So they sent him home for him to think on chemo and make an appointment but he needed to do that very fast. He gets home and is in as much pain as he was before he went to the hospital. This pain is from his kidney stones but the doctor keeps saying that he will get to that later. He went back today to get his staples out and the doc ask him about taking chemo. Papa said he Did Not wanna take the treatments. Doc said that isn't a very good choice to make that he has 3 to 6 months to live. Well no one knows how long anyone is gonna live but GOD but I do know that these docs are going by other peoples life span. Well we have had two different things told to us 1) being he will bleed to death b/c of the cancer and 2) it is a very nonpainful death that one day he will just go to sleep and just not wake up. Two diff. docs are saying diff.things. Anyone who has had this situation occur with a family member please give me some advice. How will we know when he is going down very fast or will we not ever know? I am just wanting to know what I have to look for. To let everyone know this has been very hard on me not only is he my grandfather but I am the pick out of the bunch. We are VERY VERY close and I don't know what I am gonna do when he leaves here. Just please someone give me some advice. Thank you very much!!!!

09-21-2007, 10:55 AM
Welcome- edgregory0970

I'm so sorry about your Papa. It sounds like he knows what he wants, I guess you'll just have to be prepared and try to be supportive, for what he wants to do.

I have no experiance in this area- but just wanted you to know, i'm thinking of you both. Spend as much time as you can, say what you need to say and enjoy his company and love.

Take Care- hopefully someone will reply with more advice for you. Remember we are here for you.


09-21-2007, 12:45 PM
Hi edgregory,

I am truly sorry about your grandfather's condition. Since it is possible that his cancer could have started anywhere and spread to these locations, has the liver cancer been diagnosed with a liver biopsy? How long ago did this all start? In any event, it is not good news.

Obviously, your grandfather has the rite to refuse treatment and his medical team and you have to respect that choice. While his ultimate death may be painless, with or without treatments, between now and then may be very hard. Be sure to tell his medical team about his pain level. They can give him pain medicines. Unfortunately, the pain medication will probably increase over time and he may sleep more and more due to his pain medicine.

My mother elected not to have treatment for her brain cancer. I believe it was the right choice for her condition. However, she died within two months of diagnosis. Her's really was a painless cancer. She did just went into a coma-like state. My father on the other hand did have a painful time until the pain medication was so high that he slept most of the time.

Are they planing to do anything about the kidney stones? My father had them once and they seemed to be as bad and giving birth to a baby (although I have no personal experience with either).

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your grandfather during this most difficult time.

09-21-2007, 01:09 PM
When they went in to do the colon surgery they did a biopsy. We don't know how long he has had cancer. He has been dealing with pain for the past four months. He was diagnosed about a month ago. The doc told him right before he left from getting his staples out that he can go anytime and get something done about the kidney stones. I failed to mention he went and had it busted one time but didn't bust it enough and he couldn't pass it. They put a stint in almost six weeks ago and has not even got it out yet. Only he can make the choice to get something done about the stones. I am gonna talk to him and see if I can't get him to go. He is taking pain medication every four hours on the hour. The pain meds are really working but he says they are not. His back is giving him the worst pain but that is from the stones and he is not realizing that. He has lost 45 pounds in three months. He doesn't have a very big appetite at all. I have been trying my best to prepare myself. I appreciate you replying to me.

09-21-2007, 10:58 PM
Can he have them blasted by Ultrasonic waves?? This is painless and seems to work really well.

I live with Back pain (broken :? ). This is different i Know, but back pain is the worse- your whole body hurts. I find heat works a wonder for me. I live with a hot water bottle- or heat pack. You could even hire a tenes (s? teanse) maching. It's a machine which sends a electrical current into the body, via electrode pads that stick on the body) and it makes the muscles contract and release. Therefore, easing musclular pain, and nerve. You can hire these from a chemist or buy them.....works wonders on me- it's like having a massage chair on all the time. It's not painful and i find when pain is really bad, it helps me sleep a little.( i leave mine on 24, if need to).

I hope he isn't in pain for much longer and they work out things to make him more comfortable. Thinking of you and your Papa.


09-24-2007, 05:08 AM
Yes he has had them blasted one time before but he was never able to pass them b\c they were still to big. The doc said he would have to do it again. As of this past Thursday he is suppose to be going one day this week to get them blasted again. He has done everything in this world for his back but I sure will let him know what you said. Thank you for all of your help. edgregory

10-29-2007, 06:39 PM
Dear EdGregory:
I just lost my 58-year-old brother to liver cancer on Sept. 23rd, '07. He had one tumor in his liver and the rest of his liver was full of "floating cancer cells" so there really was nothing they could do. So we were left to watch him waste away. One thing I can tell you, though, is that his oncologist (whom we trusted implicitly), said that my brother had varices in his esophagus and when he was hospitalized the one and only time (to tap ascites) they did band these varices. He was to have a followup appointment with the doctor that did the banding on Oct. 1st to check if there were more. Dr. Garcia straight out told my brother that if one of these varices burst, it would probably be the best way to die, as you just become increasingly tired until you finally just go to sleep and it is over. He said it takes a matter of 2-3 minutes and that is it. Dr. Garcia told my brother that in his opinion, it would be a Godsend to have that happen. This is in fact what happened at the end but he looked like he had just laid down in bed and there were no signs of struggle or as though he was in a lot of pain------- only as Dr. Garcia had said, that he just went to sleep. This may help you at least in this one small area. But rest assured that this would truly be a Godsend for your loved one, also. Take care and may God give you the resolve to be strong.... and he will, he did me.

10-30-2007, 03:36 AM
I'm so sorry about the lost of your brother.

It is a blessing he died so peacfully and painfree.

Best Wishes