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Thread: My dad has skin cancer and no money. What do I do?

  1. #1
    Newbie New User
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    My dad has skin cancer and no money. What do I do?

    My dad was diagnosed with skin cancer a few years back but he had it for a long time, it took a different family member going to the ER for the doctors to basically force him to get the hole in his face checked out. Since then he has lost an eye, his car, and has to live in the most disgusting house I have ever stepped foot in with the most conflict driven people I have ever met. Being a early twenty something year old female who doesn't work due to a mental disorder I have no idea how to help him but seeing him in that situation is ripping my heart out and I don't know what to do. I want to give him money but I have a good $2.35 to my name. Just looking for a little advice and to vent a little bit. Any information helps. Also he is tech challenged so anything involving technology and him just is not going to work.

    Thanks in advanced for any feedback.

  2. #2
    Senior User Dead Man Walking's Avatar
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    Lifelong resident of Lake Woebegon (Minnezotah), moved to Louisiana last November
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    Dear Kace: My heart goes out to you in your current situation, but seeing as you have no money whatsoever, your own mental disorder to deal with, and a totally uncooperative father, I don't see that you have any options open to you. If you can stand the other inmates of this rotting crash pad, you can spend some time with him knowing in your own heart that these are his final days, and perhaps get some peace out of that. If you cannot do that, then I would advise that you simply adopt the attitude that he has slipped into a coma, even though the facts may not totally support that viewpoint, and seek some peace for YOURSELF. If your dad has chosen to go out the hard way in a disgusting hovel, then he is beyond your reach just as surely as if he were in a descending fugue coma, so just "let go" and save yourself. To repeat, it IS true that he is completely beyond your reach at this point, so try to find some peace for yourself in this situation. The man that you loved years ago is already dead and gone, and what's left is simply an empty husk, and you need to accept this fact to get free of this very toxic situation. I pray that you can find some peace in a relatively short time, and from the sound of it this can't go on very long at all.

    DMW
    05/6/16 pre-op physical for surgery show low WBC & RBC
    5/22/16 [Birthday] Results of BM biopsy: AML 25% blasts with inv t(3:3) mutation, HIGH risk
    5/30/16 Undergo 3+7 chemo, but it doesn't touch AML, infections nearly kill me. Blasts 65%
    7/04/16 Diagnosis now Refractory AML. [:tombstone:]Six cycles of azacitidine, 21 shots over 7 days w/ 1.5" needle into gut + below navel.
    11/05/16 Move to NOLA - Infusion center 4 minutes away. 15 shots for 5 days with 5/8" 25 ga. needle Huge increase in quality of life.
    12/28/16 BMB shows blasts 12%
    4/16/17 BMB shows CD34 16%, cycles dropped to 4 weeks
    7/20/17 Diagnosis changed to "indolent leukemia", aka MDS
    7/27/17 BMB shows CD34 17%
    8/15/17 Venclexta chemo in PILL form added Onc estimates survival time now 2 - 4 YEARS.
    10/26/17 BMB results show 17/20 metaphases with inv(3:3) mutation-low blood cell counts - transfusions ineffective
    12/4/17 Diagnosis: Uncontrolled refractory AML

  3. #3
    Top User
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    I would suggest talking to a social worker at a hospital AND financial assistance at a hospital.
    67 year old husband diagnosed with Periphial T Cell Lymphoma Feb. 2015
    5 rounds of CHOPE chemo put him into remission for 2 years....
    June 2017 Relapse....radiation planned
    Develops ITP, Low platelets....Hospitalized 3 days to be given Gamma Gloublin....discharged....gave prednisone but forgot to give scripts for that and Klonopin....results in steroid psychosis from Prednisone.....second time this has happened. Had one instance of it during previous chemo.
    ITP recurs....4,000 platelets
    Al had spleen removed Sept. 25. It went well. Platelets up to 100,000but since he was given platelets the day before and during surgery the dr. wants to give it a few more days to see if platelets keep rising. Still in hospital. Good attitude. Grateful to God!
    Also caregiver to our 40 year old son who had a benign ependymoma tumor removed when he was 14 years old. 6 brain surgeries.
    Thank you God for all your blessings! 🙏❤️🙏

  4. #4
    Newbie New User
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    The hospitals here have what's called a "Charity Fund" for those who need medical care but have little money. It's income based and you do have to fill out a form, but it takes care of expenses. Just ask the local hospital if they have a program like this to provide help for those with low income. Also, check with your local Social Services to see if he could get Medicaid, that would cover medical help as well.

 

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