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Thread: a little help needed here

  1. #1
    Newbie New User
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    Oct 2017

    a little help needed here

    hello. i'm kinda new here and i need some assurance. last few months of my life have been hell. it all started when i saw flashing lights in my eye (migraine aura) and then developed some floaters. thought i had a retinal detachment, got over that and now my primary concern is brain tumor. i dunno it's just a feeling in the back of my head and my biggest mistake was googling and then i read that floaters can be a symptom of brain tumors and ever since then, i feel fatigued and depressed. my exams are 2 weeks away and i can't even study properly. my memory is good, i exercise daily but i feel spent, is this anxiety or is this brain tumor? i cant help but focus on my floaters and i get panic attacks that its an optic nerve tumor. like i said the biggest mistake was using dr google and it messed me up since a lot of people said that floaters are a sign and that a brain tumor can be silent.
    it's been 2 months like this. no siezures, no balance or thinking problems, just fatigue and the feeling that... something is not right....
    help would be appreciated. i feel.... ashamed saying this because i know people out there are suffering from actual brain tumors and i'm complaning about fatigue and minor pain in my arms and legs but.... i'd greatly appreciate any kind of support. should i be worried? i'm 22 years old and i can't sleep properly worrying that i'll wake up blind.
    thanks for reading, even venting out felt a little good.... to the rest of you, i hope you have a peaceful day and life. god bless.

  2. #2
    Dear Javabeam: You do realize that this forum if for cancer survivors, and NONE of us have medical degrees, and even if we did, there is no way we can provide a diagnosis to a complete stranger over the internet. Your assumption that going to Dr Google is the best way to mess up your head is a good assumption, and we see this all the time. FWIW, I have had floaters for at least 60 years, and I do not have brain cancer. The only way to get this issue resolved is get checked out by a competent doctor, and until you do you're just going to have to try and control your anxiety. If, by some incredibly unlikely chance, you are diagnosed with some sort of cancer, then we may be able to help.

    Best regards, DMW
    05/6/16 pre-op physical for surgery show low WBC & RBC
    5/22/16 [Birthday] Results of BM biopsy: AML 25% blasts with inv t(3:3) mutation, HIGH risk
    5/30/16 Undergo 3+7 chemo, but it doesn't touch AML, infections nearly kill me. Blasts 65%
    7/04/16 Diagnosis now Refractory AML. [:tombstone:]Six cycles of azacitidine, 21 shots over 7 days w/ 1.5" needle into gut + below navel.
    11/05/16 Move to NOLA - Infusion center 4 minutes away. 15 shots for 5 days with 5/8" 25 ga. needle Huge increase in quality of life.
    12/28/16 BMB shows blasts 12%
    4/16/17 BMB shows CD34 16%, cycles dropped to 4 weeks
    7/20/17 Diagnosis changed to "indolent leukemia", aka MDS
    7/27/17 BMB shows CD34 17%
    8/15/17 Venclexta chemo in PILL form added Onc estimates survival time now 2 - 4 YEARS.
    10/26/17 BMB results show 17/20 metaphases with inv(3:3) mutation-low blood cell counts - transfusions ineffective
    12/4/17 Diagnosis: Uncontrolled refractory AML

  3. #3
    Super Moderator Top User
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    I have moved your thread out of the brain tumor forum and into the Worried About Possible Cancer forum.

    Everyone has floaters, which look like flecks or small bubbles that slide across the field of vision. I can't remember a time when I didn't have these, going back to earliest childhood.

    If you have flashing lights at the edges of your vision, most visible at night, these are called flashers. They mean that something is pulling on your retina, and they should be checked out by an eye doctor, who will put drops in your eyes, use very bright lights to examine your retinae, and almost certainly end up telling you you have nothing to worry about.

    I'm telling you this not as an eye doctor but as a person with eye problems.

    You should get the anxiety looked at too.

  4. #4
    Newbie New User
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    Thank you for the replies and sorry for posting in the wrong forum, my mistake. I've had a dilated eye exam and was given the clear, my vision is 20/20 and I'm moved on from possible retinal detachment. The issue I have right now is because I ended up googling and read that floaters MAY mean a brain tumor. I understand the anatomy and the structure and working of the brain, if there was a mass of cells I've be having horrendous headaches and motor problems among other things and I don't, I just take issue with every single thing happened in my body, like right now, my abdomen is in a little pain and I'm thinking it's something bad...
    Like I said, biggest mistake was google and I'm regretting it right now, the whole thing about silent brain tumors and no symptoms. I've been talking to my GP about health anxiety and hell, I can control it very well, I do have OCD and I've been going through it without meds or doctors for years. The thing that bugs me about tumor is... if I have one it's just not about me, if I have a tumor my family and friends will suffer too, that's the thing that keeps me up at night and plauges my mind.
    sigh.... sorry for the rambling but letting it out feels a bit better. thank you for reading.

  5. #5
    Super Moderator Top User
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Your problem is health anxiety and you're aware that that's your problem. In the end we will all die, but fewer than 1 in 500 of us will die of a brain tumor. Stay away from google... in fact, stay away from the internet. Study for your exams. Once they're over your anxiety might improve.

  6. #6
    Super Moderator Top User po18guy's Avatar
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    Feb 2012
    Quote Originally Posted by javabeam11 View Post
    The issue I have right now is because I ended up googling and read that floaters MAY mean a brain tumor.
    Google is a mortician, not a doctor. I have floaters and occasional stabbing pains in the orbits of my eyes as well as other parts of my body. Because of these pains, I assumed that I might eventually have cancer at those spots. Never happened. What you are experiencing, although very personal, is not just you, it is the broken human condition. Your malaise seems to have begun mostly when you suspected something sinister, but suspicions do not produce reality. Cancer produces symptoms, but symptoms do not produce cancer.

    I tend to over-emphasize the role of anxiety as it relates to our internal lack of peace, but it is truly the epidemic of our age. Think of that: we have the longest life spans and the best medical science in human history, yet we are the most anxious generation that ever lived. Too much information for us to healthily process. Anxiety produces a false reality, but is directly treatable and can help restore peace of mind. We are not created for anxiety, but for peace. I think it would be good to discuss this with doctor, as the relief that is available might just bring much more comfort than you imagine.
    07/08 Age 56 DX 1) Peripheral T-Cell Lymphoma-Not Otherwise Specified. Stage IV-B, >50 ("innumerable") tumors, bone marrow involvement.
    08/08-12/08 Four cycles CHOEP14 + four cycles GND (Cyclofosfamide, Doxorubicin, Vincristine, Etoposide, Prednisone & Gemcitabine, Navelbine, Doxil)
    02/09 2) Relapse.
    03/09-06/13 Clinical trial of Romidepsin > long-term study. NED for 64 twenty-eight day cycles, dose tapered.
    07/13 3) Relapse, 4) Suspected Mutation.
    08/13-02/14 Romidepsin increased, stopped for lack of response. Watch & Wait.
    09/14 Relapse/Progression. Visible cervical nodes appear within 4 days of being checked clear.
    10/06/14 One cycle Belinostat. Discontinued to enter second clinical trial.
    10/25/14 Clinical trial of Alisertib/Failed - Progression.
    01/12/15 Belinostat resumed/Failed - Progression. 02/23/15
    02/24/15 Pralatrexate/Failed - Progression. 04/17/15
    04/15 Genomic profiling reveals mutation into PTCL-NOS + AngioImmunoblastic T-Cell Lymphoma. Stage IV-B a second time. Two dozen tumors + small intestine (Ileum) involvement.
    04/22/15 TREC (Bendamustine, Etoposide, Carboplatin). Full response in two cycles. PET/CT both clear. Third cycle followed.
    06/15-07/15 Transplant preparation (X-rays, spinal taps, BMB, blood test, MUGA scan, lung function, CMV screening, C-Diff testing etc. etc. etc.) Intrathecal Methotrexate during spinal tap.
    BMB reveals 5) 26% blast cells of 20q Deletion Myelodysplastic Syndrome MDS), a bone marrow cancer.
    07/11-12/15 Cyclofosfamide + Fludarabine conditioning regimen.
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    DEXA scan reveals Osteoporosis.
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    05/2016 Tacrolimus stopped. Prednisone from 30-90mg daily tried. Sirolimus begun.
    09/16/16 Three skin punch biopsies.
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    To date: 18 chemotherapeutic drugs in 9 regimens (4 of them at least twice), 5 salvage regimens, 4 clinical trials, 4 post-transplant immuno-suppressant drugs, the equivalent of 1,000 years of background radiation from scanning from 45+ CT series scans and about 24 PET scans. Having had both lymphoid and myeloid malignancies lend a certain symmetry to the journey.

    Believing in the redemptive value of suffering makes all the difference.

  7. #7
    Administrator Top User ChemoMan's Avatar
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    Jun 2008
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    As we cannot help you at this stage I am closing this thread. As pointed out it is very unlikely that you have brain cancer but if this bothers you the go to source of information is your doctor not google.

    We are here if you ever get a diagnosis of cancer. I hope this never happens.

    Good luck
    Age 60
    Diffuse Large B cell Lymphoma
    Stage 2a
    Finished six cycles of R chop 21 26th May 2008
    Officially in remission 9th July 2008
    Remission reconfirmed 1st October 2008
    Remission reconfirmed 17th June 2009
    Remission reconfirmed 7th June 2010
    Remission reconfirmed 6th July 2011

    NED AND DECLARED CURED on the 2/01/2013

    No more scheduled visits to the Prof

    RULE NUMBER 1.....Don't Panic
    RULE NUMBER 2..... Don't forget rule Number 1

    Great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

    I may not have gone where I intended to go,
    but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.


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