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Thread: My dad near the end

  1. #1
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    My dad near the end

    I don't know what else to say or even why I'm making this post to be honest. His so-called Dr's said his cancer was in remission just a few weeks ago, then oops, our bad, actually it's spreading and he's at stage 4. Bumbling idiots (far kinder words than they deserve just can't say more accurate ones on the site). Then due to blockages he was getting (he has bladder cancer) they put him on a liquid-only diet, which really nobody can live on for any extended time, and big surprise he got much weaker and then came down with pneumonia. Now today I just learned he had a stroke. I had planned to go there (out of state) for Christmas but may have to sooner. And it seems bad things often happen to me/loved ones about this time of year. No offense to anyone and not a religious comment at all per se, but I hate this d*mn holiday. Sorry for the rant.

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joe7 View Post
    I don't know what else to say or even why I'm making this post to be honest. His so-called Dr's said his cancer was in remission just a few weeks ago, then oops, our bad, actually it's spreading and he's at stage 4. Bumbling idiots (far kinder words than they deserve just can't say more accurate ones on the site). Then due to blockages he was getting (he has bladder cancer) they put him on a liquid-only diet, which really nobody can live on for any extended time, and big surprise he got much weaker and then came down with pneumonia. Now today I just learned he had a stroke. I had planned to go there (out of state) for Christmas but may have to sooner. And it seems bad things often happen to me/loved ones about this time of year. No offense to anyone and not a religious comment at all per se, but I hate this d*mn holiday. Sorry for the rant.
    Yes. The Holidays suck when your family member is terminally ill. I do celebrate Christmas but not this year. I still love Christmas and my religion even though im not a holy roller. You must have faith. If you don't, you have nothing.

    For now, speak to someone at the facility/hospital and demand answers on why they misdiagnosed him and see what type of care they will provide moving forward to make it better. I know its very hard to see and handle all of this, i am in the same boat with my Dad. It's terrible. Good Luck! Keep your head up and demand answers from the people providing him treatment. Escalate it to the highest level, someone must be held accountable!
    Last edited by dec0der; 12-24-2017 at 12:25 AM.

  3. #3
    Moderator Top User jorola's Avatar
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    Joe I am so sorry to hear how hard your dad's journey has been on him and the family. I personally feel you should try to set aside the past and just focus on getting there and just being with your dad for Christmas. Time spent with him, how ever much he has left, can be and should be the most precious. I wish there was something I could say to take away your frustration and pain but there isn't. I wish this Christmas, for you and your family is full of peace, comfort and love.
    Wife to husband with squamous lung cancer stage 3 b
    dx - April 20/14
    tx started May 20/14 - radiation and chemo
    June 23 - chemo finished
    July 4 - radiation finished
    July 8 - PET scan shows tumor almost gone, lymph nodes back to normal
    Married July 19/14
    Sept 9/14 - repeat can shows tumor continues to shrink more, no new spots. New coughing and pain due to chest infection or side effect of radiation.
    Sept 19/14 - not infection but pneumonitis, place on dex for 4 weeks
    Oct 22/14 - now off of dex and facing even more symptoms of withdrawal
    Dec 16/14 - pretty much nothing left but a scar
    April 7/15 - ditto scan and screw you stats
    Oct 6/15 - more scarring but still cancer still gone
    Feb 2016 -scan the same
    Aug 2016 - more of the same
    Aug 2017 - and ditto
    Aug 2018 - 4 yrs NED - no evidence of disease
    Aug 2019 - 5 yrs NED and discharged from cancer clinic!!!!!

  4. #4
    We are going through a hard time too. All of us here are. My husband is suffering greatly from his ICE chemo treatments. They gave it to him all at once instead of a course of three days in the hospital. It’s been harrowing and traumatic.
    Even so, I am trying to make it as Christmasy as possible. I managed to get a few gifts and my husband, son and DIL are trying hard to make the best of all this. I believe there is a reason for everything and pray next year will be better.
    His fight is over. How brave he was. 47 years of love.

  5. #5
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    Thank you for your replies, I greatly appreciate it esp this time of year. It appears he is now near the end, no thanks at least in part due to Dr incompetence/apathy. If I could beat these POSs within an inch of their life I would and enjoy it greatly. Sadly people getting what they deserve isn't what this life is about, given they are healthy and this person with a heart of gold is suffering horribly.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joe7 View Post
    Thank you for your replies, I greatly appreciate it esp this time of year. It appears he is now near the end, no thanks at least in part due to Dr incompetence/apathy. If I could beat these POSs within an inch of their life I would and enjoy it greatly. Sadly people getting what they deserve isn't what this life is about, given they are healthy and this person with a heart of gold is suffering horribly.
    See if you can hire a lawyer for their malpractice. Sue the $hit out of them.

 

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