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Thread: Kat's Story

  1. #1

    My Story

    Hi Inica, you asked to come on here and tell my story, after posting here I'll also be sharing my story with Grace for her book. I'm a 26 yr old mother of 4 and have an amazing husband , Mark, who has always been my savior and completely supportive. I have stuggled through much in my life, the nightmare which is my life started at age 4 or 5. At first I had a little accident at age 4, my grandparents dog jumped on me and knocked me off the wall of their circle driveway. I had severe head trauma and had many surgeries on my skull.when i started kindergarten at 5 my teacher noticed I was different than all the other kids in my class and made a huge scene about it with my parents, i was taken to a hospital where I had MRI's and catscans and the result was horrifying for my parents back in the 1980's Epilepsy was unheard of.That was my diagnoses.Life began to get increasingly worse for me after that.At the age of 7 I started being molested.I told my father but he said it was my fault.But that's another issue at another time.At age 14 my father allowed a 17 yr old boy who had been orphaned and had made friends with my older brother.The boy started sexually and physically abusing me, because of what i was told by my father at 7 I thought it was best to keep it a secret, as the boy continuosly brutally raping me he began hurting me more because I kept fighting him.Through 7 months of torture I suffered and survived beatings, cigarette burns on my genetals, having him force a gun inside me, a knife slowly stuck deeper and deeper into my back, being shot in the chest, many cuts "everywhere", and an STD called the Human Pavaloma Virus.I was told I was infertile and could not bare children, and even if i did miraculously conceive a child my female organs were so badly scarred and"damaged " I could never carry it to term I would always lose .Well at age 18 I was raped at work by my photographer I had learned to trust, haha yoke on me right? 6 weeks later I found out I was pregnant.My father, "my hero, NOT!" told me to have an abortion it was my fault again for the rape because i was a whore and deserved it. But I wanted my child so bad I didn't care if the baby was conceived by my rapeist or by my fiance' at the time.By the grace of God I carried my child as close to term as i could, my daughter was born February 10 of 2000 at 6 lbs. 4.4 oz. she's beautiful ( today she will be 8 yrs old in feb. and is in 1st grade), 2 months after she was born I was in a car accident with my fiance' at that time husband and proven father of first child; found out i was pregnant with my second daughter. she was born a month early on december 9 of 2000 also at 7 lbs 10 oz. but by then my body had started to fail me and could not give birth to her naturally or by csection; she was born by 4 degree episiotomy ( a gruesome painful way to have a child i felt every cut every turn of the flesh every one of the 200 stitches that would from then on hold me together) I was dead for about 5 minutes. that's when my doctors discovered the tumor on my cervix caused by the HPV virus. after healing from all that my doctors removed the tumor and froze my cervix. my husband at the time had already started to abuse me and was found the day of his second daughter's birth in bed with a 14 yr old girl.needless to say I got a divorce. 9 months later I got a job and moved my girls and I into our own house. My ex husband regardless of the abuse was allowed to see the girls on weekends.One weekend he broke into my house, raped me and said I was his property and was not allowed to see other men. Just FYI the girl he had an affair with was infected with herpes so guess what was passed on to me? Not the herpes itself but a form of it again the HPV. My female organs were so damaged by my lovely childhood my gyno nor the specialists she sent me to could access my cervix in order to recheck my paps. February of 2002 I met Mark the man who saved my life and my soul ; and my step son. Just after a couple weeks of dating we knew each other were the one and we would be together for eternity. 2 weeks later we got married. After 2 miscarriages I finally conceived my birth son. he was born via c-section on March 15 of 2003 at 7 lbs. 11 oz. One yr later my ex hired a man to end my life but by the grace of God once more when the man saw my kids he stopped and ran off. One week later Mark had the kids and I moved up to his home town 1400 miles away. By then my body was getting weaker and weaker, and the pains I had to suffer through were unbearable. Mark went on a gyno hunt and found two doctors who could help. For 3 yrs of pain , chronic fatigue, and uncontrollable bleeding the doctors revised a plan in December of 2006 to do laproscopic surgery from my belly button down instead of going up through my vagina which had failed many times before. On my birthday in January of 2007 I went in for the procedure while undure anesthesia level 4 tumors were found. My cervix was riddled with level 4 cancer, as was my uterus , everything but my ovaries. A small spot was also found on my bladder. By the time I awoke in recovery I had had a radical hysterectomy and biopsy done on my bladder.When I woke up I saw my husband sitting in the corner face as white as a sheet, and my doctor checking my pupils. My doctor then informed me what all had been done and then she said the dreaded sentence as I look in my husband's eyes. " If I had not found this when I did and did what I had to do while you were under, this come christmas would have been your last." Since February I have been in remission and constantly checked and rechecked. I'm alive today and enjoying life as much as I can. To this day I still have emotional issues with it but I am told every yr my tests come back negative I live another day longer. I'm not sure if the emotional scars and pain will ever go away. I have no clue if the daily fear I still have will ever get better but right now, right this minute, right this second I still am able to hear my children laugh and see their smiles and feel Mark's touch everytime he holds me; I still can feel his soft lips on mine as he gently kisses me as if I'll break. Today is a good day..

    My Story by Kat
    My Story : http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=7371
    ~~ survivor fighter; been shot, stabbed, 3rd degree burns, head rammed into window, molestation, rape, and Cervical Cancer twice, been in remission over 9 mnths through level 3 malignance...~~~
    AND I'M STILL KICKING!!!!

  2. #2
    Kat, where do I even begin to respond to your story? You are an amazing woman who has survived so much tragedy in your life. Have you thought about writing a book about your life? I know that would probably bring up a lot of painful memories, but just writing it might be a form of therapy for you.

    I cannot begin to imagine how hurt and wounded you must feel. And yet your story is also filled with love and joy. Mark seems like a loving and supportive husband. You have three children (two daughters and a son) if I am reading your story correctly. It seems like you get a lot of joy through them too.

    I hope you will become an active member of this forum. We have so few women who have survived cervical cancer. You have already meet Inica (In). You two have survived so much in your lives. Your stories are awe inspiring to me. Thank you for sharing such a personal account of your life.
    Jim
    Long-term cancer survivor
    1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
    2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendroglioma grade 3, same location.
    http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2405
    My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2528
    My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
    My Story Part 3: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029

  3. #3
    P.S. I moved your story to the Inspirational Stories forum and back again to leave a link there so people can read you story.

    Could I also suggest that you use a link to this thread in your signature block? Just copy and past the url address to your profile.
    Jim
    Long-term cancer survivor
    1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
    2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendroglioma grade 3, same location.
    http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2405
    My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2528
    My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
    My Story Part 3: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029

  4. #4
    Thank you Jim, and I'll try to figure out how to post the direct link of my story. and yes I given thought to writing my own book, my poetry publishers have asked me a few times to do that but I only write music and poetry , when it comes to writing a book, I can't seem to find the words for what I've endured. I gave my story to Grace77 to put in her ebook. That's good enough for me.Well have a great day Jim, in my heart, Kat
    My Story : http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=7371
    ~~ survivor fighter; been shot, stabbed, 3rd degree burns, head rammed into window, molestation, rape, and Cervical Cancer twice, been in remission over 9 mnths through level 3 malignance...~~~
    AND I'M STILL KICKING!!!!

  5. #5
    Senior User
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    205
    Hi Kat, can I first say - what an inspirational woman you are. Reading your lifes journey I found myself with mixed emotions - sad, angry, uplifted and truly amazed. Through all what life has thrown at you, you are still pushing forward and making the most out of what I believe(a lot of the time)a life which has been dealt a cruel hand. I, and I am sure many other readers have been inspired by you and it makes you stop and smell the roses, take stock of what we have and realise that we have to make the most of every day. I can only hope and pray that life is alot kinder to you in the future. I look forward to reading your poems. Please know that I like other members on this forum are here for you and are keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Love to all. Jen.

  6. #6
    thank you for that, all I've ever wanted to do is help others through their daily struggles. I too am here for you. Take care, In my heart, Kat
    My Story : http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=7371
    ~~ survivor fighter; been shot, stabbed, 3rd degree burns, head rammed into window, molestation, rape, and Cervical Cancer twice, been in remission over 9 mnths through level 3 malignance...~~~
    AND I'M STILL KICKING!!!!

  7. #7
    Moderator Top User
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,550
    Kat

    I haven't had any time to do a decent reply toy our story- But truthfuly, what can words say?. You are a truly amazing person. You have gone to hell and back numerous times and learn't to survive. HAD to survive.

    Your story will inspire many people here, as it has me. I wish you so much joy In the world, with your new Family. I also hope your health issues will improve with time.

    Thinking of you and your precious family- Inica
    Thinking of you Inica



    ~Nose Cancer~
    ~Car Accident- Broken Back, Ribs, Spleen
    Sternum~
    ~Continous Cervical Cancer~

    My Story-
    http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=6731


    9 Lives and still kicking

  8. #8
    thank you inica, i'm told so many times from very few people how strong of a woman I am and i'm an inspiration to many, but i admit there are days i ask myself what's the point. every time i have had to fight and survive ; as soon as i would get past that i would be faced with something else. i wonder many times if the reason i face such tribulation every day of my life if maybe i wasn't suppose to be here in the first place; so every time those tribulations cross my path they are a sign of a much larger meaning or purpose. but i'm so stubborn and want to be here so bad i just keep fighting and then maybe some day if i fight long enough maybe just maybe i'll finally find true happiness and start to live rather than just survive. even though i'm still fighting every day of my life for other reasons than cancer ( mental illness ), i feel as though i have earned that right that place in my life that i have fought and survived for , for so long, i have finally reached that point of living and happiness. i have 4 beautiful amazing children, 3 of which are biological and were never suppose to have even been conceived from the start; my miracles, and an amazing husband , who does have his own flaws, despite all he's suffered through along my side has refused to give up and fight with me just the same. i wish you all the luck, all the strength, and courage, and true happiness all the days of your life. In my heart always, Kat
    My Story : http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=7371
    ~~ survivor fighter; been shot, stabbed, 3rd degree burns, head rammed into window, molestation, rape, and Cervical Cancer twice, been in remission over 9 mnths through level 3 malignance...~~~
    AND I'M STILL KICKING!!!!

  9. #9
    Regular User
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    12
    Kat,

    I am pretty much speechless after reading thorough your story. It almost made me cry . It sounds like you are doing great now and you have a wonderful family, so I'm very happy for you, you deserve it!

    ~Libby

  10. #10
    Kat, it sounds like the two of us fight the same mental battle of self-doubt. I often wonder why am I still living when so many others are dying around me. People tell me that I am an inspiration and a man of great courage... they don't see me as I do. I tend to mistrust my own assessment of who I am since I am really not the best judge of my impact on the world around me. It just seems to me that my life is not making a difference... until someone else tells me how something I said helped them understand better what was going on in their life. I cannot see myself very clearly because I am manic depressive; it is hard to see what is real when looking through bipolar eyes.

    It seems to me that you are like that too. You ARE an inspiration and a courageous woman. You want to live and you are fighting every day no matter what life throws at you.
    Jim
    Long-term cancer survivor
    1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
    2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendroglioma grade 3, same location.
    http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2405
    My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2528
    My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
    My Story Part 3: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029

 

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